The Secret Doctrine of Goddess Lalita
(Sri LalitaAṣṭottara Rahasyārthamu)
9. bahirmukha sudurlabhā; 10. antarmukha samārādhyā
She who is difficult to attain by those whose attention is directed outwards.
She who is worshipped internally.
As discussed earlier, the instant Self-Knowledge arises, the seeker is automatically freed from bondage. Liberation is Self-Knowledge. There is no difference between them. Self is the ātmā, the intuitive “I Am” awareness that every human being experiences from the time of birth. One cannot deny one’s own existence. Since ātmā is our very nature and it is readily available to us at all times, there is no need to make a special effort to attain it.
In the mantra bahirmukha sudurlabhā, the word sudurlabhā means that which is difficult to attain. Devī is hard to attain since She is the Knowledge that transcends everything. If She cannot be attained, there is no hope for liberation. Although She is all-pervading, She is difficult to attain. Why? This is because our attention is always flowing outward (bahirmukha) and never inwards.
We live our lives obsessed with the external world. Because our attention is always focused on external objects, even though Devī’s presence is right here and everywhere, we fail to notice Her. Even if an object is right in front of us, it remains unavailable to us if we fail to notice it. Even if it is very close to us physically, it is as good as being at a great distance if our attention is elsewhere and not on it. Therefore, we end up seeing what we see, but not what is actually present.
In this manner, seeing other things instead of what is actually present is bahirmukha. We see names and forms, build relationships, and suffer pain and pleasure. We perceive objects and completely overlook the substratum on which they appear. The substratum is Devī, Pure Consciousness, that pervades everything. Because our vision fails to grasp Her even though She is present everywhere, She appears difficult to attain. We can only blame our finite mind for this.
How can we solve this problem? How can we attain Her? We can attain Her only if our attention is turned inwards. Attaining Her or worshiping Her means being continuously aware of Her presence. When our attention is totally focused on Her presence, we can easily attain Her. Like the objects in a dark room that reveal themselves as soon as a lamp is lit, Devī reveals Herself as soon as our attention turns inwards. Therefore, even though it appears as though She is hard to attain, for the one whose attention is turned inwards, She is easy to attain.
The words “inwards” and “outwards” do not mean inside and outside our minds. As long as feelings, such as “this is my son, this is my friend, this is my enemy, etc.” arise in our mind, it is outward-facing or bahirmukha. When our attention is on sat-cīt, Existence-Consciousness, and not on names and forms, it is antarmukha, inward-facing.